Sybil

Those of you who know me, know how absolutely enthralled I am by the book Sybil. It's a true story of a woman who's childhood was so terrible that she split into 16 different personalities. Sybil's case was such a ground breaking case that brought a lot of insight into the world of psychology. She was the first recorded person that had both male and female personalities, and she had the most recorded personalities at the time. Also she had some of the most complex personalities, each had their own distinct 'appearance', accent, views on religion, their mother, relationships, etc.

I can't imagine how terrifying it would be to not remember what you've done for days or years at a time, to not remember how you got somewhere. It's terrifying for me when I sleep walk and hide things from myself, or wake up in my garage. This would be so much worse, this is an entirely different level.

This is a book (and movie) that everyone should read sometime in their life. To see how Sybil has suffered through her terrible, torturous childhood, that affected her even as an adult, will really make you appreciate how great your life is. Honestly, most of our problems are very slight compared to what Sybil had to endure. Learning, and caring about someones struggles makes you grow, and being informed can help prevent things from happening. I think it's important for all of us to know the signs of abuse, so we can help those who are being abused and are not able to speak out against it.

According to helpguide.org, the traits that an abusive person has are:

• Dominance – Abusive individuals need to feel in charge of the relationship. They will make decisions for you and the family, tell you what to do, and expect you to obey without question. Your abuser may treat you like a servant, child, or even as his or her possession.
• Humiliation – An abuser will do everything he or she can to make you feel bad about yourself or defective in some way. After all, if you believe you're worthless and that no one else will want you, you're less likely to leave. Insults, name-calling, shaming, and public put-downs are all weapons of abuse designed to erode your self-esteem and make you feel powerless.
• Isolation – In order to increase your dependence on him or her, an abusive partner will cut you off from the outside world. He or she may keep you from seeing family or friends, or even prevent you from going to work or school. You may have to ask permission to do anything, go anywhere, or see anyone.
• Threats – Abusers commonly use threats to keep their partners from leaving or to scare them into dropping charges. Your abuser may threaten to hurt or kill you, your children, other family members, or even pets. He or she may also threaten to commit suicide, file false charges against you, or report you to child services.
• Intimidation – Your abuser may use a variety of intimidation tactics designed to scare you into submission. Such tactics include making threatening looks or gestures, smashing things in front of you, destroying property, hurting your pets, or putting weapons on display. The clear message is that if you don't obey, there will be violent consequences.
• Denial and blame – Abusers are very good at making excuses for the inexcusable. They will blame their abusive and violent behavior on a bad childhood, a bad day, and even on the victims of their abuse. Your abusive partner may minimize the abuse or deny that it occurred. He or she will commonly shift the responsibility on to you: Somehow, his or her violent and abusive behavior is your fault.

Is someone would have cared enough to pay attention Sybil's situation could have been prevented, Hattie (Sybil's mother), very obviously displayed all these signs:
Dominance: Hattie always had to be the center of attention, and she would do it however she needed to, often using her daughter.
Humiliation: One of Hattie's favorite acts was to let her feces go on other peoples lawns and yell swear words in public, this embarrassed Sybil very much.
Isolation:  This was one of the biggest factors. Hattie was ALWAYS with Sybil, she didn't want Sybil telling anyone what was going on in their house, she told Sybil she couldn't hang out with her friends, and always said Sybil didn't love her when she wanted to go somewhere.
Threats: Threats were used frequently, and almost always followed through with.
Intimidation: Hattie was a big woman, and had physically hurt Sybil hundreds of times, she almost died on a few occasions. So was Sybil intimidated? Yes.
Denial and Blame:  Hattie was very good at coming up with excuses, always blaming Sybil's injuries, on the neighbor boy, a playmate, or Sybil herself. She also always told Sybil that it was her fault she was being tortured, because she was a 'bad girl', she said if she didn't do it Sybil would go to hell. Even though Sybil rarely did something rebellious or bad.